Trying to lose!

Odd Foods!

Hey,

One of the amazing things about WordPress, and I guess all media, is the new things we learn about other parts of the world.

Here in England I grew up with beans on toast, to be eaten as a lunch, breakfast or snack. It never occurred to me to think this might seems strange to others, however having read about it in one of my posts, Matt from US has decided to give it a go, I’m waiting to hear if he liked it!

Got me to thinking, what other things do I think of as perfectly normal, that others might find weird!

So, I would absolutely love to read comments from anyone who has ever read about a food thing which seemed odd, and if remembered, which country that food was eaten in!

Since last we spoke….

Oh dear, where on Earth do I start!

Firstly an apology, it has been way too long, I very nearly didn’t write this post, not sure what I’m worried about, perceived failure maybe? I don’t know. However, I know that when I get my backside into swing again, this will be a very vital part of my story, and WHEN i succeed I will have documented the good, bad and ugly.

Ok let’s get on with the TONNES of confessions

Well, there have been terrible food choices:

Macdonalds
Five Guys
2 x Chinese take aways
lots of rubbish buffet foods
2 x Birthday cakes
chocolates
crisps
Alcohol
Subway

And that’s just what I remember!

Yep, I guess I’ve not only fallen off the wagon but I’m sitting in the road waving it off!

There has been healthy evening meals, and healthy daytime food, but the weekends have been a HUGE let down to myself!

And there’s still Christmas itself to get through.

I have even been too scared to weigh myself, doing rather crappily for someone who promised myself a warts and all journal.

On top of this, MAJOR monthly meltdown, aches and pains in every bit of me, including a very annoying headache which just won’t shift 😦

I’ve also been dealing with a bit of depression. Luckily it’s sparodic, and if I get myself in gear I can stave off the worst of it, but there have been some moments where I have sat or laid there in abject misery, crying for absolutely NO. GOOD. REASON. Well, not no good reason exactly, just made up reasons…. I sometimes wonder if brains are a good idea 😀

And ask me, I dare you! Am I prepared for Christmas???? NOOOOOOO!

And why does time not exist for me????? it’s disappearing way too fast! I feel like I’m running my arse off and going nowhere!

So, where does this leave me. OK, well, I’m not worried about my healthy me journey, yes it’s failing right now, yes, I’ve lost the fight at the moment, but I am still thoroughly confident that in a couple of weeks I’ll be back to my good old routine.

In the meantime, it’s been interesting to note that my face is getting a bit chubbier again, and my jeans aren’t as lose on me as they were. Isn’t it odd how I had to look hard for the good changes before, and yet I can spot the lbs going on very easily!

It’s also been interesting to note the stairs are getting a little more difficult again.

Strangely, given my current moody swings, I haven’t felt at all disheartened regarding my journey. I know this is a major glitch, but I also know this isn’t me giving up, no one knows me better than me, and it’s good knowing I’m not waiting for a tomorrow that will never come, I have no need to give myself excuses, I know that I will win my prize 🙂

So this is me, for now, not really proving a shining example of health, but putting it out there… The glitch is not the end of the journey, just a short break!

I’ll TRY to update, however in all honesty, I can’t guarantee a nightly update at the moment.

I haven’t totally fallen off the wagon

Hey all,

I’m struggling, There, I’ve said it.

I’m missing my exercises, not that a want to do them, but more a need to do them. The choice of doing my youtube videos is taken away from me due to room. It that might be an excuse, but I can’t seem to drag myself away from the excuse. Neither can I find the motivation to just go out for a walk. I have all the equipment I need for a walk, warm clothes, bloody good boots (my ankles never twist in them, and I never slip), a great bobble hat. So excuses have turned into my lack of motivation.

I’m not eating as well as I should, I mean the daily food is fine, the evening food is fine, it’s the chocs and the crisps which I’m bullying Paul to get out from the Christmas stock which I’m falling down on. There’s also two takeways coming up, one with my in-laws, and the other as a birthday treat to my daughter (can’t afford to take her out for a meal this year). Then of course there’s Christmas itself. I’m not feeling guilty about the splurge, I’m just feeling disheartened.

I’m emotional crash! for the first time in as long as I can remember I’m sleeping really well and yet I’m really tired. Every single weekend has been hectic, I don’t seem to feel like I’m getting any rest. And I’m not taking my Vitamin D, haven’t done for a few weeks now, they’re in a tub in my cupboard rather than out on my side, out of sight out of mind! I’m soo excited for Christmas, overly excited maybe. The ole body is also getting ready for meltdown, seems as though I spend more than half a full cycle suffering with this damn thing, aches and pains in lower back, stomach, headaches and of course coccyx, and of course the mood swings, seeing me swap from deep depression to soaring xmas mood highs. And as I’ve been so bloody busy at work and home, I haven’t yet registered with a new doctor, so haven’t gone forward with my plan for an implant. Another thing to be annoyed with myself about.

Vitamin D taken now, tub left on side!

So that’s me, my plan is as follows

Stop beating myself up
Take Vit D tablets twice daily
Keep eating healthy during week
Try not to eat chocolates and crisps, but if I do try to savour each and limit myself
Not worry about the amount of tea I’m drinking, all counts towards fluid, just keep a sharp eye on sugar intake
Book Friday off from work, and have a nice slow day, pottering about with housework if I feel like it, I can always get it done on Saturday if necessary
Hope Paul can also book off Friday, maybe go for a nice lunch somewhere, that will be a nice treat 🙂
Maybe even go for a nice slow walk on Friday, get some fresh air and quiet time

Talking to my mum and sister last night, I know I’ll be fine after Christmas, I know I’ll get back to healthy living with gusto and pleasure. I have absolute faith in myself on this. I just need to remember, this is the long haul, next year I will experience all this all over again BUT I’ll be a couple more stone lighter, hey, I might even be at the hoped for weight and health goals by this time next year!

I’ll keep updating my blog, I’ve totally missed my time reading yours and writing mine, I’ll be honest as ever so I’ll apologise now if the reading isn’t always as positive as I would like to feel. I’ll also apologise in advance for not getting a post done every evening as is my norm.

LONG SIGH!!!! Why does Christmas creep up on my every single year, it’s as though I forget it exists 😀 AND THEN, that remaining time seems to fly by! I guess the same promise to myself will need to be made, and maybe not broken next year! PREPARE…. EARLY!

Thank you for reading,

Visiting Santa – Even the poorer kids in Eastleigh will get a chance this year!

Morning All,

I was just catching up with news on BBC and came across a lovely quick article.

I remember my mum couldn’t always afford for me and my sister to visit Santa, and I couldn’t always afford to take my daughter.

Being a bit of an emotional wreck at the moment, this not only made me smile, but I’m sitting here with a few tears too! Please do take a quick look, it’s less than 3 minutes long.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-hampshire-50721343/eastleigh-grotto-for-families-priced-out-of-santa-visit

Thank goodness for people like Wendy Cummins and Hayley Moore and their community for such a lovely thing!

Just had to share!

Finished my post, came out for a fag, and saw this beautiful view!

9th Dec 2019 – I’m here! 1lb loss – YAY!

Good evening all!

Apologies for not updating, life has been CRAZY!

So, where to begin…

Well, ovens still not fixed, hopefully being repaired tomorrow.

Eyebrow has become eye brows and hair has been trimmed and layered. even found inclination to shave the pins!

Xmas presents are nearly all wrapped, still a couple to get.

Decs are still not up, though I’m still gazing lovingly at the tree!

I’ve lost another 1lb, despite next to no exercise, and hit and miss with food!

Now I’m where I was a few weeks ago, just on the cusp of losing 2 stone and getting into the 14 stone bracket!

Annoyingly I’ve lost the ticket! Must have lobbed it away along with all the accumulated receipts from shopping!

My food has been good most of the time…. And very, very bad the rest of the time 😖

I’m knackered, as usual, but here’s the thing, I’m sleeping better than I have in ages, so no idea why I’m so tired, other than the fact I’m not getting any true rest at the moment.

Work, hmmm, if ONLY we didn’t have to deal with certain customers!

So, on balance, my healthy journey could be sooo much better, but I’m making good choices most of the time.

I won’t promise to update tomorrow, it’s girls night round mum’s, but I’ll try my hardest.

Bye for now.

5th Dec 2019 – hey all hope you’re all well.

Life is manic at the moment, a fact I’m sure most of us can identify with.

Right now I’m enjoying a completely self centred evening as Paul is in London with Amy…. watching Amanda Palmer again 😀

Some cracking news, you may remember the court I live in had it’s garages earmarked for demolition, and that area along with loads of parking spaces were going to be used to build two houses, my neighbours and I fought it. And yesterday I had an email saying we’ve won! We’re all so pleased, our parking is already terrible, and the removal of about 14 spaces would have been excruciating.

This is the second day without exercising, I have no room in my sitting room, so no YouTube exercises, and I made a real effort with water today, and need a loo stop very regularly and daren’t go out the house!

That aside, I’m trying to keep the eating healthier, but am conscious that it’s not as good as it can be.

So yesterday as follows:

200ml milk, 5 cups of tea.

28g natural nuts, 1 portionish of fruit, 1 hard boiled egg, remaining sausage pasta from Tuesday night for lunch, half fun size twix.

We visited with our eldest niece, and she cooked chicken fillet with broccoli and cauliflower with potato. When we got home we had a square of chocolate each.

Today as follows:

200ml milk, 1.5l water, 2 cups of tea.

28g natural nuts, 1 hard boiled egg, plenty of fruit, salad, 5 mini pretzels.

Being on my own tonight, I really wanted to just chill out, so no cooking. I had instead a bowl of porridge with honey and raisins, followed by a mini pack of Maryland cookies.

So not brilliant days, but not bad days either 😊

Anyway, that’s me for now.

Teddy bye

3rd Dec 2019 – an ok day.

Evening all!

Poor nights sleep last night, for a split second I did seriously consider a glass of Bailey’s, because I had a drink on each evening I slept well! But then I bumped back to reality and thought there could be loads of reasons, so no creamy, calorific Bailey’s for me tonight!

Not much to report today, so I’ll just get straight to the point 😊

Food – 28g natural nuts, fruit, 1 hard boiled egg, salad.

Dinner – I could have made this healthier, but here’s what we had, venison and pork sausages (240 cals for 3 each) fried up in 1cal with some meatballs from Paul’s dinner last week (cals unknown, but I would guess about 100cals each), then smoked garlic, 1 onion, 20ish grams mushrooms, 2 small peppers, softened and cooked in sesame oil (50cals for oil), and Chinese five spice. Then adding passata, finally adding chopped sausages and meatballs. Served with 50g spaghetti.

It was delish! Could have used 1cal for all cooking, could have thrown away meatballs, but there’s loads left over, so I’ll eat that tomorrow for lunch as Paul didn’t pick up salads today.

Fluid – 200ml milk, 2 Pepsi max, 3 teas. Hmmmm. Feeling an old pattern making a good solid foothold! Oh well, I’ll try to counter it.

Exercise – well, there’s not a great deal of room in here, but Paul and I are just waiting for dinner to go down, then we’re going for a walk.

Working from home tomorrow but I need to go in and pick up one of my power cables! So there goes a lunch time walk!

Thats me for today. Night 😀

2nd Dec 2019 – Trying to stay healthy, but it’s hard!

Evening all, hope you are well.

Now we’re on the run up to Christmas I’m not going to get the chance to update this blog every evening. But I’ll try my hardest!

This evening Paul and I have been comparing price verses quality on some Christmas food, so now we know what Paul is ordering tomorrow, that’s turkey, gammon, pigs in blankets and pork pies sorted.

Given our love of cheese, we’re going to pick those from Sainsbury’s over the weekend. Most of the cheese we’ll want is waxed so getting it early will be no problem. Mustn’t forget the brie and a nice creamy blue closer to the time.

I’m not confident with cooking roast dinners – i do them so infrequently I never remember temperatures and timings, so I did a dry run yesterday, and that’s when I discovered we need a new oven! My parsnips and carrots were half way through cooking when I discovered the oven was off. We flipped the fuses, thought that might be ok, the lights flicked back on, only to discover the top oven works, but the main oven doesn’t get above 60 degrees…. I suppose it’s a good job I discovered this now, it means we can replace the oven before Christmas is upon us. What a time to happen though!

Luckily the meat was fine at this point in the warm oven, and the carrots, spuds and parsnips were chucked into the same tin to finish of actually cooking – not crispy, but hey ho – tasted lovely 🙂

Anyway, we had bread and butter for breakfast yesterday, it was a really nice fresh bread with salted butter. And then roast for dinner. We did also have some ice cream, but I justify that by letting you know that I now have room in my freezer 😀

There were lots of jobs in between all this, but afterwards, Paul made beer while Amy and I partook in a drink, a silly Christmas movie, and putting up my tree with my beautiful new fairy (angel) 🙂

And some great news! I have had FOUR solid nights sleep! For the last four nights, I’ve got up just once to nip to the loo, and that was between 5.30am and 6.30am! It’s amazing how much better a good nights sleep can make us feel.

Even better, we’ve broken the back of the bulk problems at work, so the continuous pressure should start easing now – so hopefully I can start making in-roads into catching up with all your posts 🙂

Anyway, let’s get on with some semblence of a report!

So, my exercise hasn’t started really this week, I have walked to Mum’s but because the ground is so slippy I asked Paul to pick me up. And also because it’s slippy, I didn’t really get up a good speed on my walk over.

A weird thing happened whilst I was on my way to mums, bearing in mind it’s dark, there was a bloke wandering around starting down paths to peoples’ houses, then walking away, very dodgy. But then as I got closer, he walked to yet another house and opened the door! He shut it quickly when a dog started barking.

I confronted the man, asked what he was doing, and then the person who lived at that house came to the door, obviously she’d heard the door open and was warned by her dog, she didn’t know who he was. The fella was foreign and I think he was just looking for a friend’s house, I don’t think he was up to mischief because he didn’t run away and didn’t become aggressive. But still, a bit weird. I checked the woman was ok for me to carry on, she was fine with this, apparently there was someone else in the house with her.

I thought afterwards that I really should learn to think before opening my gob, what if he was actually dodgy, what if he did become aggressive? But then I thought, what if that person had just walked into my mums! I would hope there was someone who would challenge.

Anyhow, no point thinking about it, it’s not something I think about it, mouth opens before brain engages in weird or uncomfortable situations.

And onto food?

Food was better than I expected – we had salad, but did not do eggs and were nearly out of nuts and fruit. So, today I had 28ish grams of nuts, 30ish grams of raisins and 1 banana and my Salad. Talking about the salads, Paul and I have decided we enjoy the prepared salads so much we’re going to save ourselves time and continue to buy them for our lunches. I don’t feel bad at all about this, we’re choosing healthy and I’m not having any dressing. So my lunches now have spinach, spring onion, beans, sweetcorn, pineapple, prawns and mozarella.

Tonight we had tuna with rice, peas and sweetcorn.

Fluid, I’m keeping up with my morning milk, 1 glass of water, 1 can of pepsi max, 5 cups of tea. I know this isn’t great, but for now I going to keep having nice hot cups of tea. I am making sure I have less than a level teaspoon of half spoon sugar, which is my main concern with having tea. If it wasn’t for the sugar, the tea would not be an issue counting towards my 1.2 litres per day.

So that’s me for now.

Wishing you a very good evening/day.

30th Nov 2019 – PHEW what a DAY! Oh, and 2lb loss – YAY!

Good evening all!

What a day! We haven’t stopped and my day ended today with the wrapping of about 30 pressies!

And we’ve got loads still on order!

So I’ve just sat down to relax, it’s 22:25! And I’m treating myself to a cheese straw.

I would like to tell you its on a tea plate, but i cant lie! its on a dinner plate 🤣 and yes, that is also a glass of Baileys!

Anyway, let’s get on with how I’ve done.

Firstly, two GREAT nights of sleep! Only got up once on each night, heavenly 🤗

Yesterday was a mostly good day, usual weekday nuts, fruit and 2 hardboiled eggs. Homemade veggie soup round mum’s yesterday afternoon. Friday fish and chips for dinner. We also had a few Maltesers and cheesy nibbles, and a couple of glasses of booze.